Tuesday, April 1, 2014

I'm sorry about not being a good friend...

Several facebook status updates have me really irked. 

They may or not be directed at me but I still took them personally. 
Some were DEFINITELY directed at me as myself and my fellow friends were called out (not by name but as a group) 

So to the people who like to complain about myself and others not being a good friend to them when they needed us....

I'm very sorry that my life is so hectic right now that I haven't had time to call or email.
I am spending every waking hour (and there is wayyyy tooo many waking hours around here lately) trying to just stay afloat mentally. 

I'm sorry that I haven't called or emailed you when you "do for everyone else" and only "want someone to help me out too". 
I feel the same way about you. 
My phone isn't blowing up with calls from you either. 

I'm sorry that I haven't called or emailed when you felt "so alone". 
My husband works 2nd shift, and in case you forgot- I have 5 kids all under 7 years old by myself to get homework, supper, baths, and bedtime done. 
I too often feel alone. 

I'm sorry that I haven't called or emailed when you "really wish I had someone I could count on".
I live 2 hours + away from any family and long term close friends that would gladly help out if possible. But life is life and some seasons are harder than others. 
I like to think of friendship as 50/50. But that doesn't mean that at some stages in your friendship you have to sometimes give 80 and only get 20. When the seasons change in your friends life they are going to be able to give a little more... and when you need them and they can... they will gladly give 80 while only getting 20 in return. 
I have spent many many nights crying because I too felt very alone. But never have I criticized my friends for me feeling quiet overwhelmed and alone on that day. 

Maybe I'm too prideful.
I almost never ask for help. 
(even when I really need it) 
I rarely admit if I'm overwhelmed. 
And I try so very hard to never make any of my friends feel like they aren't doing a spectacular job. 
You know why?
Because they are human. 
And they have busy lives too.
And in my busy, crazy, hectic season of life I haven't called them either and I really have no idea if this is their busy, crazy, hectic season too. 

So I ask you this- before you judge me or anyone else regarding being a horrible friend to you remember that each one of us are living busy lives and juggling our family and friends is hard. We beat ourselves up enough without your hurtful post rubbing it in our face that we really cant do it all and keep everyone happy.