Update to end the year

It's a few hours until 2012. I figured it was a perfect time to post an update of how things are going. 

I have spent the past week in bed sick with a possible cold/sinus infection. I went to the doctor on Thursday to hopefully get some medicine to help speed this mess along. It tops my worst doctor visit list. I saw a doctor named Dr. Ketchen at Carolina OBGYN. Her beside manners were about as bad as Dr. White's from the same practice. I have a sinking suspicion they are related. Perhaps siblings. 

Needless to say, that second visit from the same practice left a bad taste in my mouth and has caused me to change OBGYN's. It's actually quite difficult to change to another practice being 20 weeks pregnant. A lot of people wont accept you. However, with permission from their office manager I have an appointment with a place called "Woman's Clinic" for Thursday. I am very excited as I have heard great reviews from a local mama board I'm a member of. Not only have the doctors been given awesome reviews, so has the office staff. 

In other news.... 

We have decided to start decorating the boys rooms after the new year. We are letting them have a lot of say so of what it looks like. Of course that will be tweaked a bit to help blend in with the rest of the house. We will wait on painting the living room/kitchen until after their rooms are finished. Thank Goodness for Ebay, Craigslist and Goodwill!! I'm hoping to finish the rooms off pretty frugal. Here are the ideas so far. 

This is one Zachary really likes. He has a full size bed so the cute firetruck bed will have to be changed. 

His favorite part is the color. 

Tripp likes this room. (He's into anything transportation) We aren't too sure about having a mural on the wall so not sure how this would work. Not to mention, the green color on the bottom of the room is the same color we were thinking of using in the living room. 

And my sweet Brennon. Who is simple. He likes this room because Zachary would have a bed just like his and sleep in the same room. Such a sweet boy. 

And I really like this for the master...  Not quite sure what I'd do with the fireplace in our room though... Lots of time to think about it I'm sure. :) 

And last... the nursery. I like this one but I'm not sure if yellow would be too girly is this little bean is a boy. I have some yellow in my bedding... I'm just not sure. 

This is my bedding. I dont really want to use green or blue since we will be using it in the boys room or living room. Still pondering on this one... 

So that's a run down of whats been floating around  in this brain of mine.... I have a few other things but I feel those deserve their own blog entry. 

I hope you all have a wonderful 2012!! 

Halfway there....

I'm 20 weeks today. 

Officially halfway there. 

Unofficially less than half way there since I have my babies a couple of weeks early.

Here is my updated weekly pictures. 

I'll post a real blog entry later. 

Christmas Time....

Christmas is a holiday I always look forward to. Even more so now that I live so far away from family and friends.

Christmas also brings a lot of different personalities together that sometimes clash. We can love our family members and still not always like them. Reality is, loving someone doesn't mean you will always like them and agree with them.

This year I realized something. Actually, a few things....

1. I still have a temper. It takes a lot more to make me so angry that I "loose" it momentarily, but I still have it. I am pretty sure it's always going to be deep down in my blood. I think instead of working on my temper, I should spend more time working on how I respond when I start to boil. 

2. I love my sister more than I realize. When I feel like her heart is breaking, mine does. When I feel like she is sad, it makes me sad. When I know she's happy, my heart could burst with happiness for her. I truly love her. 

3. There has only been a small (and I mean tiny) amount of people who have changed my first impression of them. The rest, I was 100% correct about. 

4. Lazy people are so eager to call our someone else's faults. I guess it's easy to sit on the couch and think about everything else people do that you don't like. 

5. I should make a public announcement that no one has to "walk on egg shells" around me. I simply ask for the same respect that you expect from others. If "walking on egg shells" means waiting to say something behind my back instead of to my face because you are to much of a coward to hear the truth about yourself, well... I suppose you probably SHOULD "walk on egg shells" around me. 

6. I dislike more than anything else butt kissers. People who take crap from other people because that person makes more money than you. It's pathetic and degrading. 

7. My mom has the biggest heart in the entire world. She spends so much time, money and energy making Christmas perfect for everyone. I hope she knows that it doesn't go unnoticed. I love that she loves my boys like her own. Wait... not like her own... better than her own children. She was an amazing mom, but she is the most incredible Nana any kid could ever have. 

Okay, I think that's all the important ones. 

Here are some quick pictures of our Christmas. I'll try to caption them as I add them. :) 

I hope everyone had a fabulous Christmas this year. 

                                                              

Josh and me at Mema & Papa's. 

My niece Keira! 

My niece Payson! 

Christmas Morning! I think they were actually shocked that Santa brought them toys. 

Christmas at Pa and Nana's house. (Left from right) Kolin, Brennon, Tripp, Kaylee, & Zachary. 

Rainy Day....

On most days that are filled with rain and storms I find myself getting super depressed and tired. 

It drains me completely. 

I have zero energy. 

And zero motivation. 

Today however, as the rain pours down, I am reminded that God has promised to wash away my sins and my short comings. I am reminded that with each bad day brings a good one. 

Yesterday was a rough day for me.

 Emotionally I was a mess. 

I felt trapped in a world I didn't understand, and serving a God who I felt like at times wasn't hearing my prayers. I knew He had not left me. Yet I wanted to curse him in anger and frustration. 

I don't "get" circumstances, and people, and life in general at times. Fact is, I'm not supposed too. 

I'm serving an awesome God who has everything figured out. And here I sit worrying and stressing about the smallest details of life. 

I believe God is allowing me to get to the lowest of lows so He can be there to pick me up and show me a better life. A life filled with less sorrow, more understanding, love and peace of mind regarding things I can't control. 

I went to bed with a heavy heart, praying for peace and understanding. I woke up this morning with the sound of rain drops hitting my window and knowing that God was there, as He has always been, promising to wash away yesterday as He did to my heart. 

 God is good ALL THE TIME. 

Goodbye facebook... for a while. :)

I deactivated my facebook. 

First time in the 7+ years I've had it. 

And honestly, it feels good. 

If you want to contact me, you can do so at ladybugamber@yahoo.com

Most of my friends have my number... but if not, shoot me an email and I'll get it to you.